Thursday, June 18, 2009

Good, Great, the Best....My Grandpa

I know that I promised some pictures, they are coming (go to my facebook to see the latest, but I will post some on this blog). The last couple of weeks have been such an emotional up and down.
My Grandfather (Wayne Olen Phillips) lost his wife. my step Grandmother about 8 weeks ago. My Grandpa was having some issues with his health and so my Mom asked if I would go pick up my grandfather. What a pleasure that was. I rode over with my Dad in a blizzard of a trip, we only stopped to drain liquids (pee) or pick some up (mountain dew and gas...for the car). It was a good chance for my Dad and I to catch up. How often are you allowed to just spend 13 hours with you parents anymore. It was awesome and we had some good conversations.
I was only in Oregon for one evening (Friday). My Grandpa did not seem the same, he was happy to see us but when you were not in direct conversation he would slip off to some state that seemed as if he was not even tied to this world anymore. We had some good times and watched a few baseball games, which he always loved. We got up Saturday morning and did a few things around the house and then we headed toward Portland. My Grandpa seemed a little sad, I wonder now if he knew that this would be the last time he would see the ranch, if he knew that this would be the last time he would pass the fields where he raised my mom and uncle, the last time he would drive into the town that he himself was raised. Anyway, I am starting to tear up. We went to the airport in portland where we said goodbye to my Uncle, Aunt, cousins, and my Dad. Grandpa and I proceeded into the Airport where we got all our luggage on as well as his medical devices (breathing and Diabetic stuff). Looking back at this time, I loved it. My Grandfather and I talked for an hour before the flight. He would tell some stories and I would share some thoughts. We laughed and we loved, it was great. Although I knew that my Grandfather was being kind he never talked about himself or how hard it was, he never talked about the elephant in the room (his failing health), he only talked about good times and about his love of family and friends. We got on the plane and continued our, what I will call, bonding. By the way, we flew first class...My Grandpa loved that, thought that he had finally arrived (he was so funny).
WE landed and made our way to the Gate where we found Scott and his Family. Scott and Grandpa have always been close, they are so similar that it is only age that seperates them (no wonder that these Men are two of my Heros, they truly are giants among us). Grandpa was so excited to see Scott, Sharon, and his Great Grand babies. Soon my mom and Ryan showed up in the Car to pick us up, Although my Grandpa had left the place he called home he was coming to live with his daughter whom he has always loved. I love watching my Grandpa look at my mom, he has such love for his only daughter. He would always comment that he was so proud of his beautiful girl, once again this is another one of my heros...my Mom (she is one of the few people that I would describe as Celestial). We then made our way to my Mom and Dad's place. We talked that evening and then made Grandpa feel at home.
My family arrived the next day and I enjoyed seeing the reunion of Julie and the boys to my Grandpa. To them this may have just been another figure in the family that they had only meet a few times but I hope someday that they will get to know Grandpa the way I know him, one of the best men to walk this earth. I have told my children that I love their Great Grandpa and that he practically walks on water.

Over the last couple of weeks Grandpa has gone in and out of the hospital. We never knew when we would see him last so we made the most of it. I will always cherish the moment of having 12 people in a little hospital room talking about Grandpa. Good memories that I am sure Grandpa keeps close to his heart as well. Grandpa was such a trooper, even though he had been up all night being poked and prodded he was always so happy to see us. He would always put on a smile and laugh with his signature laugh that was so infecteous that it made everybody happy. I would always leave with tears that that my have been the last time I saw him...The heart can only heal so many times. Finally the call came, I was at work and it was Friday morning. My dad called and could hardly get two words out, but was able to communicate that Grandpa was about to leave us and that I should call all the kids and get them up to the house. I called Julie and she came and picked me up from work with all the boys. We got up to the house right after Grandpa had passed away. It was a tough time, people were crying and I would even say wailing for the passing of Grandpa. At the time I was sad and my heart ached but I was able to keep the tears at bay, I don't know why but they just did not flow at the time but in time I would fill my eyes with enough moisture to make the Sahara a rain forest. It was a time where we could hug and cry, talk about Grandpa and just sit by the body he once possessed.
Julie, the boys, and myself stayed for several hours and then we came home. It was decided that the funeral would be in Oregon the next Friday. Julie and I decided to take the long way to Oregon and make some fun out the long drive. We spent some good time going up to Northern Idaho, Washington (Seattle), and Finally Oregon, We did everything from the Space Neadle, Couer D'alane, Mt Raineer, Ferry Ride, Multinomia Falls, Sea lion caves...It was fun.
We made it to Oregon and we spent a lot of time with family talking and walking the roads of the ranch. It was fun to see cousins and other family. I went for walks with several people and just talked how this place has a lot of memories but it just is not the same without Grandpa. I used to look forward to pulling around the corner to the house and seeing Grandpa on the porch, but now that he has gone coming around the corner just is not as sweat as it once was. We woke up the next day for the funeral and my family and I got there a little early. So I got to go and sit in the viewing area we just Grandpa and I, that is when the first tears came. I cried but I could control it. We participated in the viewing and I was able to give the Family Prayer, it was an honor. We then all went to the Sacrament room where we my Uncle gave one of the best talks I have ever heard. It was of a Son who was so proud of his father, I was touched and could have listed to him all day. Then my Mom stood up and gavc THE BEST TALK I have ever heard. She talked as if my Grandpa was right beside her (which I believe he was. She testified of the Gospel and bore her love for not only her beloved father but for a Heavenly Father that lost his son so that we can all be together again. My mom bore her sole to us all in a display of Daughter to Father. SHe told stories and gave character references to a man that she has an eternal love for, she was proud of Grandpa and she knew that he was proud of her. I love my Mom, I closed her talk and I felt like I wanted to request an encore. She could have talked for hours and I would still have been glued to her. I am so proud of her, she knocked that one out of the park. We then listed to the bishop and wrapped up. I was blessed to carry the coffin out to the car...This is when I lost it. I cried like a little baby, I just remember at that moment I could not hold back the wall of tears that came crashing down. My sole ached for my Grandpa, I missed him. My testimony is solid and I know that the Gospel of Jesus Christ is true. With this knowledge come the understanding that my Grandpa is in a better place and that someday we will all be together...but for that moment I wanted to see my Grandpa, I wanted to hear his laugh, I wanted to smell his distinct lumberjack smell....but I could not and for that I cried, for that I was sad.
We wrapped up the funeral and then went out to the Grave site....He recieved a soldiers burial, as he served his country. We said our goodbyes and that was that. We spent the rest of the day with family and just talking. It was a good day, a day I will never forget.

Julie and I woke up the next morning and made our way back to Utah. It was a long drive, we did not get home until 2AM. We spent some good time together and I know my Grandpa was proud of us all.
Wayne Phillips is a man who will be missed. He lived a life that we are all proud of, now he returns to loved ones that have gone on before him. I know he is with my Grandma and they are united once again. I hope he looks down on us once in a while and that he knows we look up with thought of him very often. My Grandpa grew up with very little, he had parents that loved him and married a beautiful women, who he would later care for when she could not take care of herself. Was a Dad to two wonderful children and a Grandpa many more (11, and a Great Grandpa to many, many more. I love this man, he was the best. He was one of the few I call my hero. I shall see him again and our reunion will me so sweet, until that time my memories and prayers will continue. Love ya Granpa...

Just a few thoughts in my words,

Lance

4 comments:

  1. Lance, that was very sweet. It made me cry. Love you.

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  2. I ditto Sarah. Very Beautiful. I will greatly miss him.

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  3. I ditto Sarah and Alicia...I am here at work at 2 in the morning with tears running down my cheeks. I miss Grampa everyday...there is definetly a void in our lives, but thank goodness we know we will all be together forever one day.

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  4. Wow...Lance, I'm at work...don't make me cry. What a tribute.

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